Henry Louis Mencken / 1880–1956 / Baltimore, Maryland, USA / Journalist, Essayist, Cultural Critic
Americans
Nobody ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of the American public.
Chicago Tribune, November 19, 1926.
Conscience
Conscience is the inner voice that warns us somebody may be looking.
A Mencken Chrestomathy (1949).
Cynicism
A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers, looks around for a coffin.
A Little Book in C Major (1916).
Education
The aim of public education is not] to fill the young of the species with knowledge and awaken their intelligence… Nothing could be further from the truth. The aim … is simply to reduce as many individuals as possible to the same safe level, to breed and train a standardized citizenry, to put down dissent and originality. That is its aim in the United States… and that is its aim everywhere else.
The American Mercury, April, 1924.
It is the classic fallacy of our time that a moron run through a university and decorated with a Ph.D. will thereby cease to be a moron.
Source unknown
Freedom
But the right to freedom obviously includes the right to be foolish. If what I say must be passed over for its sagacity by censors, however wise and prudent, then I have no free speech. And if what I may believe – about gall-stones, the Constitution or God – is conditioned by law, then I am not a free man.
Christian Science, 1927.
I believe in only one thing: liberty; but I do not believe in liberty enough to want to force it upon anyone.
“The Physician,” in Prejudices: Third Series (1922).
Ideology
An idealist is one who, on noticing that roses smell better than a cabbage, concludes that it will also make better soup.
Source unknown.
Law
Injustice is relatively easy to bear; what stings is justice.
Prejudices: Second Series (1920).
A judge is a law student who marks his own examination papers.
A Mencken Chrestomathy (1949).
Life
Life is a constant oscillation between the sharp horns of dilemmas.
Letters of H. L. Mencken (1961).
Marriage
Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who would want to live in an institution?
Source unknnown.
Mencken on Mencken
I go on working for the same reason that a hen goes on laying eggs.
Source unknown.
I believe that it is better to tell the truth than a lie. I believe it is better to be free than to be a slave. And I believe it is better to know than to be ignorant.
Minority Report: H.L. Mencken’s Notebooks (1956).
Public Affairs
Democracy is the theory that the common people know what they want, and deserve to get it good and hard.
A Little Book in C Major (1916).
Democracy is also a form of worship. It is the worship of Jackals by Jackasses.
Notes on Democracy (1926).
The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by an endless series of hobgoblins, most of them imaginary.
In Defense of Women (1918).
For every complex problem, there is an answer that is clear, simple, and wrong.
Source unknown.
All government, in its essence, is a conspiracy against the superior man: its one permanent object is to oppress him and cripple him.
The Smart Set, December, 1919.
A good politician is quite as unthinkable as an honest burglar.
Source unknown.
Every decent man is ashamed of the government he lives under.
Source unknown.
It is inaccurate to say that I hate everything. I am strongly in favour of common sense, common honesty, and common decency. This makes me forever ineligible for public office.
Source unknown.
The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out for himself, without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos.
The Smart Set, December, 1919.
In this world of sin and sorrow, there is always something to be thankful for; as for me, I rejoice that I am not a Republican.
Minority Report: H.L. Mencken’s Notebooks (1956).
Puritanism
Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy.
A Mencken Chrestomathy (1949).
Religious Tolerance
We must respect the other fellow’s religion, but only in the sense and to the extent that we respect his theory that his wife is beautiful and his children smart.
Minority Report: H.L. Mencken’s Notebooks (1956).
Truth
The men the American people admire most extravagantly are the most daring liars; the men they detest most violently are those who try to tell them the truth.
A Little Book in C Major (1916).
Wisdom
The older I grow, the more I distrust the familiar doctrine that age brings wisdom.
Prejudices: Second Series (1920).